Clarifying Your Identity Disparities

The other night, my daughter had gotten in trouble and had to spend some alone time in her room.  When she came out, she came to me very thoughtfully and asked if we could talk about something.  Of course, I could feel that there was something coming in the impending conversation.
 
She said to me, “Sometimes I think I’m dumb”.
 
She’s eight, and this is what is weighing on her mind.  How often do we have similar thoughts?  How often do we wonder how others see us and how we see ourselves?  But the real question is, how often do we decide how we want to see ourselves and make it happen?
 
As we’ve walked through the process of discovering your intentional identity in my previous posts (Starting here).  I’d venture to guess that the answers you put down don’t always align with the thoughts in our head.  And, now days, weeks, or quarantines later, maybe you’re in a different mood or place...
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Being There For Others in Times of Crisis

For the past couple of months, each of us has been dealing with our own version of change and challenges during this crisis and unprecedented situation.  We have also clearly seen that each of us had unique aspects to our situations.  Some are struggling with losing a job or a loved one.  Others are struggling with maintaining a work from home career on top of homeschooling.  Even others are trying to keep their small business afloat despite a lack of customers and income.
 
During these times, we may each go through waves of feelings.  From overwhelmed to bored, from stressed out to grateful, and everywhere in between.  One of the things we may be encountering is a significant difference between your personal situation and that of friends, relatives, and colleagues you encounter on a regular basis.
 
I know personally I have both struggled with my situation and also felt guilty that I had it so well while others were struggling so much more....
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Returning to a New 'Normal'

The focus of society these days seems to be how and when we can get back to normal, post coronavirus.  While it may not quite be ready to fully reopen, we are starting to see some of the restrictions relaxed.
 
If you’re like me, you may be looking ahead and wondering what ‘normal’ might look like.  Can I suggest a few things to consider as you begin to plan how and when you will return to your pre-corona activities.
 
Make A Personal Decision
I’ve heard it said about this crisis that we are all in the same storm, but in a different boat.  It’s very important to remember that we are not all in the same boat and therefore we will all need to make smart and safe decisions for our family on how and when we return to normal activities.  In this type of situation there may be a lot of pressure and influence, on social media or the news, or judgement from other individuals on the choices you are making in your situation....
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Fight Like a Girl - 3 Lessons from Game of Thrones

As I was thinking about continuing on my Game of Thrones theme, I found the following meme and was inspired...

Episode 3 of Season 8 was fantastic, but if you haven't seen it, beware of this spoiler alert.

I have to say, this episode made me both very anxious and very proud. I'm not sure I quite put it all into perspective until it was summarized in the meme above...what I LOVE about this show is strong women. Sure, there is romance and handsome kings, and a lot of other themes 'for women', but what really hits home for me, is the women who know who they are, fight when they need to, and hold firm to what they believe. Here is my take, with some help from Game of Thrones, on how to Fight Like a Girl.

Brienne of Tarth

1 - Don't be afraid to go against traditional stereotypes. Both Arya (top left of meme) and Brienne (bottom left of meme) weren't comfortable with the roles they were assigned by birth. Both were born into higher class families with the expectations of becoming...

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5 Leadership Lessons from Arya Stark

Although she doesn’t go by the name of Queen, and really has not interest in it, there is still a lot to learn from Arya Stark’s journey through Westeros and beyond.

For those of you who don’t follow Game of Thrones, here’s a bit of background.  Arya is the youngest daughter in the Stark family, known for their leadership in the North, particularly from Winterfell.  Arya has one older sister, Sansa, who desires nothing more than to be married to a king.  She also has three brothers and one half brother.  Of her brothers, Robb, the eldest, has been King of the North, Jon, the step brother, has been leader of the Night’s Watch, and Bran, while crippled, has become the Three Eyed Raven, who can see all things.  Unfortunately for Rickon, the youngest brother, he has not played an important leadership role. 

While growing up, Arya was very different from her sister Sansa in that she never dreamed of being a Lady....

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5 Leadership Lessons from Daenarys Targaryen

Over the past couple of months, my husband and I have been preparing for the Season 8 finale of Game of Thrones by rewatching the first seven seasons.  And while we are not quite finished, we are still pushing through before the new season starts tonight.

 

 

Yesterday, as I was contemplating what we have been watching, and what will happen in the upcoming season, I was thinking specifically about Daenerys Targaryen and the trials and tribulations she has had since the beginning of the show.  As I reflected on this, I realized there are some business leadership lessons to be learned from the Mother of Dragons, and really, many of the GOT characters.  But today, we will start with Daenarys Stormborn.

 

1 - Do what you have to do, until you find something better, then do that.  At a pretty young age, Daenarys was brokered to marry Khal Drogo of the Dothraki, to earn access to an army for her brother.  While she did not want to marry...

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Peace in the present.

As with most individuals, I have an ever present stream of motivational quotes in both my Instagram and Facebook feeds. Today, one of them spoke to me in a new way. This is a quote that I have heard many times before, especially in yoga and meditation classes, but for some reason I saw it differently today. In retrospect, it seems a little obvious, but I thought it was worth sharing nonetheless...maybe someone can benefit in the same way I did.

 

 

In the past, this quote has appeared to me as a way to explain my current mental situation. If I'm feeling anxious, like I was during an insomnia episode last next, it's likely due to me worrying about my future career, the outcome of a particular project, or wondering if my kids will turn into responsible adults...all thoughts of the future. If I'm feeling depressed, or in my case having a case of the blues, it's usually because I am regretting a previous decision, wishing I would have handled something differently, or...

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